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Friday, September 14, 2007

Caution: Content may be offensive

No, I'm not warning you. That was part of this CNN article. Spineless.. well, I can see their point, and the need for a "may be offensive" label is more indicative of societal decadence than CNN's fault, but I'll take any opportunity to bash CNN.

Regarding the article itself, I think it falls in the category of "someone needs a good @$$ kicking." Now, I don't oppose polygamy per se. It's not unethical, and it's probably not immoral, especially if circumstances like war lead to a highly unbalanced gender ratio.

Apparently, some people oppose it on consequentialist grounds, which is odd. Everyone benefits from legalized polygamy except for males at the bottom of the social order, and if there is a war on they're probably busy eating bullets anyway.

The problem is that the people who practice polygamy are also maleducated, inbred pederast hillbilly cultist fanatics. (Possibly correlated due to the primitive conditions that make polygamy desirable). That leads people to conflate polygamy with hillbillyism. The article I linked mentions polygamy several times, despite the fact that it has no relation to the story itself. None. The 'marriage' in question was monogamous and possibly legal. The elements of "maleducated inbred pederast hillbilly cult fanaticism" were there, and since CNN insists on bringing up the tangentially related topic of polygamy, my theses are proven.

(1) People confuse polygamy with pederasty.
(2) CNN is incompetent.

Since CNN is the second most popular news network, and FOX is first, this leads us to conclusion 3:

(3) People watching the news are incompetent.

We take it as axiomatic that the people who ignore current events are incompetent (in a slightly different way). So,

(4) 98% of everyone in America is incompetent.

In that case, I don't see how our government has the authority to punish these pederast hillbilly cultists. Vigilantes, at least, back their words up with actions. Therefore, I reach the air-tight logical conclusion:

(5) Someone needs a good @$$ kicking.

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