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Friday, October 28, 2005

SCOOTERGATE EXPLODES!

EtherMedia (28OCT2005)

Washington - the wet dreams of a thousand frothing college students were fulfilled Friday as a high-ranking member of the Bush Administration was indicted. The charges against Lewis 'Scooter' Libby include perjury, obstruction of justice, and other reiterations of the main point.

For years, the Democrats have been known as the party of truth and "principle before profit." Since it is ludicrous to imagine a Democratic administration in this situation, the DNC is pulling out all the stops to score political points.

"We respectfully disagree with the Republicans on many issues, but lying under oath is an apalling, apalling offense," said a former president who wished to remain anonymous.

His assistant added, "MMf, mmmhmm-mg."

President Bush has yet to hold a press conference, leaving media and Senators like John F. Kerry in the lurch. According to Senator Kerry (D-MA), "The president should already have spoken to the nation to explain this outrage. I have no doubt that when he does speak, it will be characteristically premature."

Sources close to the White House say that all of the shades have been drawn shut.

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