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Monday, April 18, 2005

Flashback

I had to secure the rights to use this... This is a conversation I had Friday...

Me: I owe the IRS 2500 bucks
This Dude: You do?
Me: yeah, well, i don't really owe it to them, but if I don't pay it they'll put me in jail
This Dude: Sounds like your up the creek without a paddle.
Me: eh
This Dude: So, what are you going to do?
Me: what all good americans do
This Dude: Cheat.
Me: hell yes
This Dude: Hope you don't get audited.
Me: well, I can cheat legally, that's the beauty of having a corrupt government
This Dude: Yep. As long as you mail your taxes by midnight, you should be ok.
Me: I do mine online
This Dude: That's the best way. How much do you think your refund will be?
Me: well, as I said, I owe them money, so I will get a bill
This Dude: That sucks.
Me: yes, it puts a damper on things. however, I still have enough cash. It may delay my real estate investments- which I don't have yet
This Dude: Well, it will happen. Just give it time.
Me: yeah. like a week. 3 years, more likely
This Dude: You have a long wait my friend.
Me: yes!!! I just saved 2200$
This Dude: That's a start.
Me: now I only need a few nmore loopholes and I'll get my refund back
This Dude: Sweet.
Me: I love you, Tom Delay and other congressmen who've made a mockery of our tax system over the years.
This Dude: They suck.
Me: but capitalists like me can live at the expense of the working class.
This Dude: True.
Me: except for sales tax. Damn Ppoenix light rail project.
Me: Phoenix I mean
This Dude: My dad paid his taxes back in early February.
Me: I would have, but some various agencies didn't send me the forms. like the broker. actually I got that one.
This Dude: Paying taxes is a [edited]
Me: that's why we're secretly building a network of nuclear-armed militias to overthrow the government
Me: just kidding
This Dude: It sounds like a good idea.
Me: I wonder if having a car explode is deductable. I thought it was, but this site is vague on that particular issue.
This Dude: What site are you using?
Me: taxactonline.com. i'm deducting it
This Dude: I have to go now.

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